Betty Dodson’s descriptions of orgasm which she outlines in her excellent book Orgasms for Two come from over 30 years of teaching women to orgasm, and her own orgasmic experience, which may be unparalleled. Her descriptions of orgasm are guided by her own biases, which favors genital stimulation, and while she discounts the experience of some women, these descriptions offer a great starting point to discuss the multitude of ways men and women can experience orgasm. Below is a summary of some of her orgasm types, with additional comments.
Pressure orgasms. Dodson ties these to early childhood experiences rocking back and forth or masturbating by squeezing your legs together. This orgasm comes from indirect stimulation, no rubbing, but instead applying pressure (by leaning heavily against or on something). As children we may engage in this kind of self soothing and sex stimulating behavior even if it doesn’t result in an orgasm the way we think of them as adults. A study published in the journal Pediatrics in 2005 took note of this very common form of self-stimulation, particularly in young girls. Some adults may bring this behavior into their sex lives and have orgasms from it.
Tension orgasms. This is the orgasm that comes from direct and intense stimulation usually while you are holding your body and muscles tight and tense, and holding your breath. Dodson considers tension orgasms the most common, favored because they are quick and dirty. She also calls them “peak orgasms” as they offer an intense build up followed by a sudden release. Tension orgasms could be our default because of early sexual experiences, which are often secretive and quick. It’s often been suggested that for men, premature ejaculation is a result of learning early on how to get aroused and orgasm quickly. For women too, early experiences can influence later ones, and Dodson encourages people to try to experience more orgasms beyond these, even if they do do the trick.
Relaxation orgasms. Dodson describes this type of orgasm as coming not from a build up of tension, but from deep relaxation during sexual stimulation, where you continue to release tension and relax your muscles and eventually the orgasm sneaks up on you. As opposed to the “peak orgasm” Dodson cites Shree Rajneesh, a master and author of Tantra, Spirituality and Sex , who refers to these kinds of orgasms as “valley orgasms”.
Combination or blended orgasms.Ideally orgasm is a fluid process (no pun intended) and if sex play lasts long enough you’ll get to enjoy more than one experience during orgasm, which we can call a combination orgasm. For Dodson, who has been teaching women to orgasm for over 30 years, combination orgasms involve a specific set of actions, including: “clitoral stimulation, vaginal stimulation, PC muscle contractions, pelvic thrusting, and breathing out loud.” One could broaden this definition to include orgasms that offer a variety of experiences and opportunity for you to pay attention to the different waves of orgasmic feelings.
Multiple orgasms. While female multiple orgasms are more often talked about, both men and women are capable of having multiple orgasms. Dodson distinguishes between multiple orgasms and the “aftershocks of pleasure” that follow a big orgasm, which some people might call orgasms, and which allows them to count 20 or 30 orgasms a night. One of the pitfalls of multiple orgasms is the trap of waiting for them and having anxiety about whether or not you’ll have them. Do either of these things and your attention will be taken away from the pleasure you’re feeling, which is a waste of an orgasm whatever number it comes in.
G spot orgasms. The g spot debate is far from over, and while Dodson doesn’t discount them, she favors clitoral stimulation at least being in the mix, and offers a wary attitude to those who argue for orgasms that come from penetration alone. Nonetheless, many women report orgasms that come from g spot stimulation being fundamentally different from orgasms that come from other kinds of stimulation, and given the number of women who have written and talked about it, they certainly deserve a place in the orgasm encyclopedia.
Fantasy orgasms. Dodson largely discounts the idea of orgasms that result from mental stimulation alone (which is not surprising given her belief in the supremacy of clitoral stimulation). In fact there have been several studies and years of anecdotal reports by women who have orgasms without any physical contact, and from mental fantasy alone. There is a tendency by many to see orgasms from fantasy as being less than other kinds of orgasms, but this attitude seems to come mostly from rigid thinking about the right and wrong way to orgasm, and less from people’s personal experiences.
Sources:
1. Dodson, Betty. Orgasms for Two. New York: Harmony Books, 2002.
2. Freud, Sigmund. Three Essays on the Theory of Sexuality. New York: Basic Books, 2000.
The female orgasm is a subject that has always generated a lot of attention. The first vibrator was invented in the Victorian era to relieve a woman's "hysteria" by bringing her to orgasm.
